Smooth As A Baby’$ _ _ _

by Hunch on July 24, 2011 · 5 comments

in Lifestyle

If you are a single gentleman of means or a wife or girlfriend looking to give the gift for the guy who has everything can I suggest the Zafirro Iridium razor.  According to the official website the notable features include the following:

Exclusivity – 99 numbered units will be produced at a price of $100,000 USD each, like with all fine items monogramming is available

Pure Sapphire Blades – hypoallergenic; oxidation and corrosion proof

Thin – less than 100 atoms across

Pure Iridium Centerpiece – dense enough to survive a swim in lava

Pure Platinum Screws – not dense enough to survive a swim in lava


This razor has everything; exclusivity, extraterrestrial metals, hypoallergenic properties, and curves that put to shame the girl I was thinking of instead of paying attention in Latin class.  Seriously though if you have the wealth to purchase this item and have it represent a reasonable percentage of your disposable income you’re probably dating a girl that except for you abundance of cash and possibly intellect is way out of your league.  You don’t want your scratchy, stubbly cheek rubbing up against her Downy soft one do you?  Plus, and this is more for those of you who own property in Hawaii, how awesome is it for you to say that you woke up this morning and shaved over a volcano; coupling the heat of the volcano with the fineness/sharpness of the blades the closeness of the shave should be unparalleled.


A friend commented how he needed one of these razors because he couldn’t tell me how many razors he’s lost by dropping them in volcanoes.  If we can find enough iridium to make really long tongs he’s good to go; if not he’ll have to wait till the lava cools and chip the razor out of the rock but either way that’s one razor not lost, just inaccessible.  Seriously though this razor comes with a ten year guarantee and let’s face it you’ll have it a lot longer than that.  Let’s look at the average annual cost of shaving.


Replacement Blades – 13/year @$20 each  >  $260/year

Shaving Cream – 4/year @$10 each  >  $40/year (with a razor Zafirro sharp don’t use cream)

After Shave – 2/year @$75 each  >  $150/year (shaving that close might not lend itself to aftershave)

Total $450/year

The cost of this razor is about 22 times the annual average and adjusting for time value of money it’s much more but hey inflation may run rampant right and who else has a numbered iridium razor?  Really if you can spend $25,000 + on a wristwatch shouldn’t you spend a multiple of that on a razor; I mean when’s the last time you cut yourself with your watch?

{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }

Turc1656 Turc1656 07.29.11 at 18:36

yes, you should spend more on your face, i totally agree. people look at it much more so it only makes sense.

i mean if people have to look at my ugly mug then i should at least try to ease the pain. here are my watch and shaving finances:

watch – 50-60 bucks, have it for 7 years now. about $7 – $8.50 per year.

i use an electric razor. so about $150 and they last me about 8-10 years. that’s about $15 – $19 per year.

it’s a little shy of the $25,000 watch with the $100,000 razor, but a reasonable multiple still exists for us po’ folk.

Aaron_Williams 08.01.11 at 13:18

Judging by the close up of George Soros in Bloomberg’s Business Week: With all the missed spots on his face, he makes it seem like when you become super wealthy, having to shave your face is only a formality like eating, crapping, and sometimes sleeping. Things that just slow you down in your daily conquests.

Hunch Hunch 08.01.11 at 14:29

Dr. Williams: I agree that with a particular wealth level or unwavering self assuredness your unkemptness is moot. However, I’ll refer you to Downy soft. A secret to life’s happiness, keep your lady happy she’s well worth it. – Hunch

Ariel 08.02.11 at 17:58

I think the only people who will recongize this status symbol in your shower would be the other 98 dudes who bought this… and a really what are they doing looking through your shaving kit. And I thought the rugged look is in? I guess manscaping has really gone to the next level.

Hunch Hunch 02.01.12 at 12:46

Editorial Note: There are now Gold and Titanium razors priced at $18,000 and $2,000 respectively; and new products are expected but unannounced for 2012. I still say go for the Iridium, particularly if you live in Hawaii or other Vulcanian regions.

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